First and foremost Happy Valentine’s Day darlings! I think Valentine’s Day is a beautiful reminder to appreciate the ones you love. Even if that means just calling them to say two things you love about them.
I picked up this fabulous off the shoulder side tie red dress from Abercrombie and Fitch. Which is on sale btw! This looks completely different than the Abercrombie and Fitch I worked at eight years ago, so shout out to their new buyer this linen dress is so beautiful!
I recently finished reading a book called The Light We Lost by Jill Santopolo and it made me rethink my perspective on love. At one point in life I thought love was very black and white. Now I know there are tons of gray areas with love. Times where you are so drawn to someone that it is entirely magnetic and other times when you just get butterflies. Then just complete admiration for another person. You can read some of the reviews here to get a good summary. By nature I am a complete hopeless romantic. I love nothing more than great conversation, when a guy plans out a unique date and remembers the little things I even forgot I said. This always shocks my friends, because I’m often single and dating longer than I am in a relationship. I’ll be honest with you all, it’s because I have been afraid of commitment. Why? When I am in a relationship I am one hundred percent invested in my person. I use every spare minute I have to do what my guy wants, shop for the perfect birthday gift for him, plan a party, hang out with his friends and sometimes his family. The thing is in the past this has not been reciprocated. My ex’s have often been insecure due to rumors their “friends” made up, comments about me being out of their league or allowed their families to dictate who they can date and make racist remarks to me. The only thing I wanted was quality time with my man, who loves and trust me unconditionally and would stick up for me with his family/friends.
This past year I have taken the time to completely fall head over heels in love with myself. I have planned trips, taken acting classes, laughed with old friends over lunch, gone to viewing parties for my fellow actors, had drinks with some interesting people and honestly loved every minute of it. Ironically I had a four-hour conversation with a stranger about love, life, and marketing. Our conversation basically reminded me that through everything, I still completely believe in love. The kind that is patient, magnetic, passionate, selfless and comes when you are completely happy with where you are in life.
This year my Valentine is my fur baby who loves me unconditionally and I am completely fine with that! Do you think there are different types of love?
This is my grad cap. Two years ago I graduated from the University of Miami with the intent of finally moving to Los Angeles to pursue acting full-time. Over the years I pursued other hobbies and interest of mine, however, my heart kept pulling me towards acting. This has been my dream since I was in the fourth grade. I never mentioned my plan to anyone, except my mom since she has consistently supported my dreams. I always wanted to go to college, but once I got there I never truly felt like I found a school where I belonged. There were times I questioned if I wanted to stick it out and finish my degree, however, I never wanted to look back and wish I just pushed through. My last year I made some great friends that continue to inspire, support and love me unconditionally. This cap was the first time I was going to show my family and friends what my plan was post-graduation.
I went through the process of downsizing to save money (and meet an awesome roomie love you Nicole) and put my stuff in storage to later be shipped to LA. It took about six months longer than planned for me to save up to make sure I had a contingency fund. I did move to Los Angeles and live there for six months, however, I wanted to look into other opportunities in a less expensive area. So I moved to Atlanta, where tons of movies and TV shows are being filmed every day. I currently work a corporate job (which obviously was not my original game plan). A girl has to eat after all right? I still audition on the weekend and hope to pursue my dreams full time. Even though this is not where I planned to be when I graduated two years ago, I can honestly say these past two years has taught me a lot. I have learned to stick up for myself. I use to let my families expectations, unsolicited commentary and advice affect me. These past two years has given me the strength to say look, guys this is my life and you don’t have to approve of everything I do or say, but you will respect it. I have never done anything that has hurt anyone or affect anyone else’s life. I have not relied on you for financial or emotional support so I do not have to do what you want. This is my one life to live and I have the autonomy to do with it what I please. I have also learned to love the season of being single. There are so many people that make this seem like a death sentence, but it is not. This is the one time in my life where I only have to worry about my needs, deal-breakers and wants. If I want to travel halfway across the world tomorrow I don’t have to ask my boyfriend if he is okay with it or if we have dinner plans with his parents this weekend. My point is graduation brings a sense of hope and fear. The world is literally yours to make your mark no matter how small. It can feel intimidating! That my dears is the beauty of this all, there is no wrong way to live your life as long as you stay true to yourself.