Hello beautiful people! How are you? Now that the weather is warming up and people are starting to move around, I thought it would be great to talk about staying motivated on your goals!
5 Ways to Stay Motivated
Find like-minded friends. One major perk of this quarantine is we have all become more resourceful. You do not need to physically sit in meetings to get goals accomplished. Two of my friends joined selling groups on Facebook to sell products and have been making money. I took Shonda Rimes Masterclass after reading two books on writing screenplays and joined a group of female writers. It has been great to check in weekly and hold one another accountable for our goals. We met on Zoom once a month for 3 hours and go over each person’s goals, one another’s script notes, and protentional film-related interest. By having a deadline and people to hold you accountable, you are more likely to get your goals accomplished instead of delaying them.
Schedule your time. Think back to high school you had to be in class from 8:00am to 3:30pm. Then dance class (or whatever fun activity your parents paid for or pushed you to do) from 4:00pm-6:00pm, dinner at home at 6:30pm, homework from whatever time dinner ended till midnight. Then you woke up and did it all again. This quarantine has given a lot of us the time to make our own routines, find a schedule that works for us. Schedule time to meal prep a few items so all you have to do is microwave them and go. Schedule time an hour to work on a passion project every day. Do you have a business you want to start? Dedicate time to researching it, reaching out to people you know whose brains you want to pick, see if there are articles from a magazine or newspaper in that industry to give you more insight.
Know your why. Why do you want to do this? Is it because you want to retire in 10 years instead of working for someone else until you die? Is it because you want more time to focus on your parents since they are getting older? Is it because you want to be there to want your kids grow up? Knowing why you want to accomplish your goals will motivate you to keep pushing forward even in the scary times.
Feel the fear and do it anyway. Sometimes we get excited about a new beginning then we immediately start to panic. Do not play the what-if game. You miss 100 percent of the shots you never take, it’s better to try and learn what not to do next time then to spend the next 10 years wondering what would have happened if you hadn’t let fear get in your way.
Do not let other people’s insecurities overcome you. We all have relatives, friends, and significant others who mean well but are incredibly negative. The minute you mention working out, starting a healthier lifestyle, wanting to start a business, or looking for a new job. They cut you off and start belittling your choices. Do not be afraid to work on your project and potentially launch it before telling them. You have to limit the number of people you give the power to speak into your life. If they want to stay at the job they complain about every day, not making the best food choices that’s fine, but that does not mean you need to apologize or stop trying to better yourself. Honestly, after a while, these people will come around when they see how much happier you are and ask you for tips on how to improve their life. Just keep your head down and focus on your why.
Your mental health is so important. How do you stay motivated to accomplish your goals?
I found an old journal from 6th grade this weekend. It was from my English class, back when we had to start the first ten minutes of class copying the prompt on the chalkboard into our journals then writing a paragraph or so about the prompt. I absolutely hated writing at the time. Partially, because I loved an in-person debate more, partially because I never felt people correctly understood what I was saying when I wrote. The second journal entry asked what is your definition of success? Back then my response was to own multiple homes in various parts of the world, to make Forbes list of successful people, to have millions in the bank, be married, have kids, and be on various television shows.
As I’ve gotten older my definition of success has shifted I still want to be on various television shows and in movies that will probably never change – but I also think having free time is the ultimate success. We trade so much of our time for money to provide for ourselves, our families, get the next big thing, or show off. I think the true definition of success is having enough money to live comfortably, own your home, be able to work on passion projects like volunteering for charities you love, spend quality time with your kids while they grow up, having a loving respectful marriage where you both share the household work.
Over the years I’ve worked with so many “successful” people who were the angriest, most ungrateful, paranoid people on the planet. The kind of people that see others as stepping stones to their goals, unfortunately, every time they reach their next goal they are still unhappy. They think by making the next 10 million dollar deal for the company they will be fulfilled and get a pretty decent slice of the pie. Unfortunately, their idea of success keeps getting bigger and bigger. Three houses throughout the country, another midlife crisis car, frequent vacations to other parts of the world, a private school for all of their kids, college funds, and trust funds. All of these things are wonderful but can wear on one person when they are expected to keep bringing in more income every year to keep up with the family’s spending. (Lifestyle creep is real!) One of them admitted that he doesn’t consider himself successful because his friend has a net worth that’s 5 times the amount of his. They say comparison is the thief of joy and they would be right.
I think when we focus more on what makes us happy and excited, why we do what we do to make a living then we can appreciate our success. Instead of thinking of all the family members, or friends you want to impress think about what you really want to do. Where do you really want to spend your time and money?
Just popping in to say this week has been hard. I know so many people have gotten the unfortunate we are letting you go phone call. Be sad, be angry but remember it’s not your fault. I repeat it is not your fault! This shit sucks. It sucks that doctors and nurses are running out of supplies, ventilators and having to decided who lives and dies. It sucks that we have to fight over food because some people had the resources to overbuy more than 3 months worth of food while the rest of us only got two weeks worth. We are in the middle of a global crisis. Companys are responding irrationally by letting go of people that have been on their jobs for over 5 years. It feels cruel and personal, but I promise you we will get through this. Economist are stating this is worse than the 2008 recession. One of the scariest times of my life when I wondered if my mom and I were going to have to live in our car. We got through that hard patch and we will all get through this one too. You are more than the number on your paycheck stub. Remember that your true value comes from your character. How you treat other people and move in the world.
Take this time to be thankful for your loved ones. Hug them tight, Zoom conference call them, and talk to them about your mental health! Reconfigure what you want to do with your life. Are you great at Public speaking? Can you edit a resume like no other? Well it’s time to think of how to make those skills marketable. Maybe make a Facebook page promoting that and look for other opportunities to make an online course for people in your niche market. I believe in you. Be kind to yourself friends and feel free to email me if you need someone to talk to just click here.
This past rainy Friday I had the honor of joining a bunch of women for a Women in Film symposium. Even though I was incredibly stressed on the way there due to the traffic caused by Trump visiting the CDC. (Yes, I too I’m surprised that he actually came considering he originally cut funding to the CDC but that is beside the point)! At the Women in Film seminar, we all spoke about the fact that we need to start creating more quality content on our own. Stop waiting for the perfect audition to come along and choose you. We are all storytellers and now is the time to start sharing those stories.
The following women headlined as speakers Christine Adams from Black Lightning a series regular reoccurring – a dream role for many of us. Charlene Fisk a director and cinematographer who created a beautiful short film about her own coming out story. Caroline Slaughtera producer, writer, director, and actor who created a short film about the women who lead actresses to Harvey Weinstein. Sara Elizabeth Timmins the producer for the 6 part mini-series documentary Mcmillions. I’ve watched two of the episodes of McMillions and it really pulls you in. Listening to Ms. Timmins speak really made me think about investigative journalism. It’s a branch of film and gives the producer the opportunity to create the B roll that guides the story along.
At the seminar, we discussed how we all have so many stories to share and that we can’t sit and wait on Hollywood to come up with them, unfortunately, the majority of writers is not female therefore we need to be proactive in writing our own stories even if it means doing it on a smaller platform such as YouTube or spending the time to try to get on to Amazon or into different indie film markets. One fascinating way to go about doing that would be to think about the causes that really matter to you. I’m very passionate about Mercy Ships which is a charity that performs surgery on children that need their cleft lip to be repaired, helps with leg deformities, tumor removal and gives these children the ability to live a healthier life. If I was to do a movie involving a child with a cleft palate I could potentially reach out to Mercy Ships an ask if they would also like to Co-sponsor/promote said film this would be a great way to spread the message further and hopefully you get more people interested in the cause. Which would ultimately have a bigger positive impact for everyone.
I almost didn’t make it to the seminar because I was so stressed due to traffic and being an hour and a half late. If you know me I’m very punctual. It completely stresses me out to be 10 minutes late. I always like to come at least 15 minutes early if not half an hour. However, something in my spirit told me that I needed to be there that night and not to just skip out because I was stressed. That it was better to walk in late and be slightly embarrassed but receive the message meant for me then to stay home and wonder about what could have been.
The symposium was in honor of International Women’s Day and I was very empowered to be around a bunch of women of multiple cultures all proud to gather and share how we can improve our film industry in Atlanta. How can we get more women working behind the camera? What do we need to change to help women become better writers? One guy even asked for tips on writing female characters. One woman brought up that we all have a nurturing side and an aggressive side a feminine and a masculine and that he just needed to listen to that side. We also brought up the Bechdel test, and that you do not need to use a rape scene as a way to make the character “stronger” or give her an arch. That women can build character through other trials and tribulations the character goes through. We can all implore to be better in the film industry whether that means learning how to edit, become better behind the camera learn how to execute sound instead of the usual costuming position or being in front of the camera. It was awesome to have a bunch of men also in the symposium since the only way to move forward is to have allies. I ran into my friend Brittany who I shot a short film with. We both agreed that we need to write and update our material because we work so well together.
As I drove home I felt light. I realized I was meant to come to the seminar that night. I ran into a good friend I hadn’t seen in over a year and now we have a project we can work on together. I met a couple of great women who are working on a play and may need some help directing, casting a role or backstage – which would be really fun and great for my resume. After all, I always love the intimacy of a black box theater the buzz of the energy in the room as the audience anticipates the show that’s about to begin. So often we let the stress of the day and the little things block us from our blessings. I just want to remind you to not allow the little attacks to detour you from your true purpose.
Hello Beautiful people! I hope you all had a beautiful Valentine’s Day full of love and laughter. I had the pleasure of seeing the Photograph this weekend and I enjoyed it from start to finish. I love how the writer connected the two main characters well before they were even conceived. I think it was a beautiful expression of fate. This film will definitely become a modern staple of black love stories – instead of films like Love and Basketball,Brown Sugaror Poetic Justice. The perfect cherry on top of the Black History month sundae.
I found it incredibly refreshing that Issa Rae’s character Mae worked in a galley as an art curator. A job I often thought would be so fascinating to do. Picking out pieces for the masses to come and enjoy that will also bring funding to a museum is super cool. This was a refreshing change from the stereotypical roles black women often play in movies with as the “arrogant shred boss everyone hates” instead these women were strong, confident and determined to make something of their lives. Mae’s mother had the confidence to pursue a photography career in New York on her own against all odds.
The Photograph shows us just how important communication is. Mae’s mothers’ lack of communication caused her to miss out on the greatest love of her life. She also struggled to communicate how much she loved her own daughter because of her mother pushing her away emotionally and prematurely kicking her out of the house. Mae’s miscommunication with Michael almost caused her to relive her mothers’ fate. What are some ways you can better communicate how important people in your life are to you?